Slow down…Day 15

I am getting to the age that I feel as if time is speeding up. I can remember things back to when I was only 2 yrs old; things seemed so fast and I never had enough time to absorb everything. As I aged, I couldn’t wait to grow up and enjoyed the fast pace so much that I had a house full of 7 children and still found time to throw in other jobs here and there. But now, I realized that time stayed the same but with maturity I was able to keep up. I can no longer keep up the same speedy pace and see now I wish I would have slowed down sooner to savor the moments more.

My babies are growing up and some even having babies of their own. My other babies are either in college, getting ready for college, or dreaming of the things they plan on doing when they are “grown”…of which being only a few years away.

I see my babies having babies and it has me in awe that I did all that and then some. I see the cycle of life and I realized as this circle has made me a Nana, I want to slow down again and try to take everything in because it is just zooming by too fast. I am looking forward to more weddings, more births, more graduations, more happy tearful times.

So, if you have a mom that hugs you a bit longer or sends you a text telling you she loves you… Or maybe a Nana that calls you to come bake or have cookies with her… Take the time to let that one know that you love her because she is one of your biggest fans!

I love you, Ma…even though you don’t even know that I have written this, I am okay with you not knowing of my writing because I have told you how much I love and appreciate you. I’m sorry I had to come to know how much I love you with the wisdom of time…but that’s the point…in due time.

Slow Down by Nichole Nordeman

Roles…Day 14

Sometimes we play a role on someone’s life that could be profound. You could be the Emergency Medical Technician that serves the role of saving your life. But sometimes you could also be effected by the role someone else may play in your life. You will not always know the role that you or someone else will play, so be sure that you play that role to your best ability.

My daughter is going to college to become a Paramedic. I worry, of course, because I am a mother. The role she will have to take on is a strong and calm role. I am not worried that she will not be able to do it. No, that girl can do anything she sets her mind to. But I worry because there are several roles she will have to take on in her life that could cause her to question her own role from time to time. A paramedic can not save everyone. While saves and helping others is the role of the EMT/Paramedic, there are times that God has other plans.

To my daughter, if you should ever read this…Don’t ever lose sight that God does what HE sees fit. God will help you and others but there are times that He does not. It is not your job to be God. It is your job to do His will, thy will be done. I love you. I am your biggest fan and I will ALWAYS be here in triumphs or even if you just need to cry.

Roles…we all have several parts…do your best always and maybe you will learn the profound role you had…in due time.

Tact…Day 13

Just because you like honey, doesn’t mean you should find a hive and poke it.
There are many ways to approach things in life. While being honest is what you need in a good relationship and communication, how you say things to another is important too…it is called tact.

Tact can be a tricky concept to learn. Especially, you if you are wanting to effectively communicate, you have to be thoughtful to how you piece your words together. Honestly, being tactful can be very taxing on the brain; so much that there are times that I choose to say nothing at all.

Some say that they can not be honest AND tactful. It takes a special kind of person to be able to choose their words carefully enough to continue the open communication. But let’s be honest here, you may have a well seasoned tactful person with a person that has no care of tact at all and the open communication will still come to a halt. Therefore, tact should be a concept that we try to use often; especially with those we love. In fact, to take care and use your tact shows a person how much you do care and appreciate one to keep the communication progressing.

While I am not always the most tactful person, I can also be known to say things with grace. I do feel I am a bit out of practice because others around me are not quite so tactful…but this is something I want to work on a get back to being good at again…in due time.

Third point of view…Day 12

I have often heard, “There are two sides to a story.” But that line leaves out the possibility of another point to view; it would actually be better if you learned how to have a third point of view. To have a third point of view would mean that each party is equally heard and understood. That would mean that even though you may not agree with me, you are still open enough to understand the logic of the other point of view. If you can achieve this, then you will have a third point of view.

However, this does not always happen with both parties. Often, one party is able to see that third point of view but does not get the sense the other comes to the same view. Quite often the person that achieves third point of view will start to build resentment and lack of equality.

Take the time to view both sides.
Know that if you want to be treated a certain way, you must serve as an example.
BUT, also know that you can not change anyone else other than yourself. If the other will never see your point of view, it is better to walk away than to build resentment. Resentment builds over time and can poison any relationship….in due time.

Letting go…Day 11

As I have mentioned before, I have 9 children of which 5 of them are adults. The most recent of age 18yr old is starting college. I have been through this before with my children reaching an age that they want to have freedom to go and do what they want. I understand they each want to, forgive the term, spread their wings and fly but I have a hard time letting go.

Are you thinking of the song from ‘Frozen’ yet? Go ahead and sing it or play it to get it out of your head if you need to…this seems to be an earworm many have battled.

As parents, we naturally want the best for our children. We want them to have better advantages than we had, we want them to have strong relationships that will be their security when we are gone, but most of all, we want them to do better and be stronger than we were. We work hard raising them in hopes they will live up to their full potential. And while these are parents best intentions, the new bird that wants to fly thinks that we just don’t want them to fly at all.

Even though I have other children that have already left the nest, I have not learned how to cope with letting go. I have all these fears that run through my head…car accidents,  wrong influences, drinking/drugs, getting pregnant, getting sick, getting lost and no help, and more. As a mom, I fear a LOT!!! My mother taught me the only way to get through it is to pray to God that He will watch over them and keep them safe AND have confidence that what I have taught and how I have raised them will stick.

I understand that they need to experience their own battles and triumphs. But letting go to let them get those bumps and bruises along the way is the hardest. I just hope that they will continue to understand that no matter what, I am their biggest fan and I only want the best…in due time.

 

 

MSG… Day 10

When I was a child, I would periodically get really bad headaches that would cause me to feel as if I was going to vomit. The pain continued into my puberty and I was told it is probably the result of hormones. Later, pregnancies brought more headaches which was blamed on more hormones and increased blood flow. Finally, after my headaches became constant and crippling, I started leaning to a possible food allergy. For a time, I thought it was potatoes because I noticed I would always get a headache after eating chips or french fries. But then, one busy day, all I had to eat were Doritoes and I could not handle the pain or anything in my stomach anymore. I was floored and when I finally started to feel better the next day, I was determined to figure out what was causing me to cry in the shower begging God to take me or the pain away.

Doctors and many websites list foods that could trigger a migraine: caffeine, chocolate, sausage or pepperoni, too much sugar/too little sugar, alcohol, fermented cheese, aspartame, sulfates, nitrates, and MSG.

Even though on that busy day I didn’t eat enough, the culprit of my pain was listed on the bag of Doritoes ingredients. Monosodium Glutamate. This had me reading more on MSG.
I learned MSG is in almost all seasoning out there. And while it would be nice to only have to be on the look out for just MSG, I learned that MSG is used to make other more expensive products cheaper. MSG takes on the flavor of other seasonings and intensifies the flavor, allowing a food processing plant to stretch out those more expensive ingredients.

Technically, MSG occurs naturally in many foods. But chemically and broken apart from the other natural compounds, it becomes an excitotoxin. The first part of the word is “excito”, yes, it excites your brain and tastebuds. Your brain is tricked into believing that the food is amazing and even triggers so much excitement, you will binge or overeat. This is exactly the reaction the food companies want to increase their sales and profit! The second part of the word is toxin. Toxin translates to damage that occurs at the cell level…that is your brain cell. Over a prolonged period of ingestion of this toxin, it may inflict permanent brain and nervous system damage.

Over the last 5 years I have had to read labels and learn, sometimes even by the hard way eating the wrong thing, there are many names for MSG and the derivatives. I have had to face others not believing me and calling me or implying that I am being a hypocondraic. Ultimately, I am the one that faces the consequences each time I eat the wrong thing. Each time I risk and eat something that may contain MSG*, my reaction and pain becomes more extreme. You don’t have to believe me because you do not suffer the same sensitivity but that does not take away my real pain. You can tell me that it is natural but that does not change the toxin effect.

If you know someone that suffers from a MSG sensitivity, show that person how much you care by learning more and understand that just because you don’t suffer painful reactions does not mean it may not be a toxin to your cells. Know that when the packaging claims No MSG*, that * is there for a reason. If education continues and we stop buying chemically laden food, companies will forced to remove harmful ingredients and start producing real food with real nutruition…in due time.

MSG counterpart list I commonly look for:
monosodium glutamate (MSG), yeast extract, hydrolyzed or autolyzed yeast, hydrolyzed vegetable protein (HVP), hydrolyzed plant protein (HPP), sodium caseinate, kombu extract, disodium insolnate, EDTA

Please feel free to search more but below is a site that will list far more than above.

http://www.realfoodwholehealth.com/2011/05/excitotoxins-msg-and-hidden-names/

Nerd… Day 9

I am nerd and I smile when I make that statement about myself. I don’t always feel nerdy but there are times the nerd inside me bubbles out. A nerd is a person that is not only socially inept but also a person who is intelligent in technical fields. Let me break this down into two parts, the socially inept and then the intelligent in technical fields.

When I was a little girl, I would cry when I was forced to go to the skating rink or to enter a new school. My mother and sister would encourage me and tell me that I was really good at making friends. Little did either of them know that I was actually very awkward at figuring out what to say that I often let others just talk. I would see a person that was often alone and say hi, the rest was all the doing of the other person talking because they were lonely looking for a friend. Ok, I also learned to ask questions that would prevent me from having to talk much either. I just never seemed to fit in any social aspect until the military. Clear rules were set and everyone was expected to serve by those standards. If you give me clear parameters, I will learn them and excel. However, take me to a party or some other large social gathering and I am a little girl again trying to figure out how to get out of it.

Enter in the intelligent in technical aspects. If you ask me, I would not claim to be Einstein but compared to many, I definitely have a bit more potential and active critical thinking skills than the average Joe or Jane you pass in the store. I will not name everything I am good at because, one, that is not humble and, two, I haven’t really sat down to make such a narcissistic list. So, as a brief example, tonight I started speaking of the magnets fields and pole movement having an effect on the climate cycles; in conjunction with the solar weather…and all of this was started by my daugther making a statement about hoping to get more snow this season. Poor girl, she was trying to say good night and I made her eyes glass over; hey, that should count as something…maybe I helped her fall asleep! The conversation was ended with me stating that I am a nerd and that I love her. Before she said good night back, she told me that she likes nerds that they end up being some really interesting people. She made me smile.

Maybe you know a person that was or is socially inept and can make your eyes glass with technical topics. If you do, just call that one a nerd with love because that nerd will come to smile back…in due time.

Day 9

Horror Movies…Day 8

I did not get to write yesterday (Day 8) because I didn’t have enough alone quiet time. I do not write well when there is a busy household happening in the background. Nor do I write well when I feel like someone is hanging over my shoulder. Even though I have committed myself to writing 365…I am not going to let myself become burdened by missing a day and feeling as if I have to double up the following day. This will cause stress and regret toward writing again. I want my writing to be beneficial, not harmful.

With that said, I will continue on with Day 8….

Horror movies. I think there is a certain personality type that enjoys horror movies. While I could link a study about the percentage of people thrilled to watch a horror movie, it seems there is a study out there that will manipulate the query or findings to interpret whatever you are wanting to use for your persuasion. There are statistics that say more men enjoy horrors than women; I am sure that must be true on the opposite spectrum that more women enjoy romance aka chick flicks more that of a man. But now I am getting into more complicated topics that should be reserved for future topics…back to personality types that enjoy horror. Or maybe I should say, there are personality types that do NOT enjoy horror.

Let’s face it, I was crying and totally upset when they ended the movie, ‘Marley and Me’ with Marley dying and no spark of happiness when the credits rolled over the screen. I was left expressing that someone should have warned me because I also had crying children at the end when I thought I would send them to bed with smiling feel good faces. Ugh! How horrible! I didn’t want the cruel world as a source of my entertainment that night! And when it comes down to it, I want my entertainment help me to smile, laugh, and feel refreshed enough to face the harsh cruel reality of life when that flickering light screen turns off.

I did title this Horror movies and there are some many types….Saw, The Conjuring,  Amityville Horror, The Shining, Jaws, Halloween, Ring, The Omen, Psycho, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and more… Their commonality is they all scare a person because it displays horrid and gruesome deaths. Why? Why would someone being cut fillet and eaten like that of Silence of the Lambs or The Walking Dead be entertaining? I do not enjoy watching one person have to murder another to save the lives of himself and his family as a source of entertainment to take me away of the cruel world. Actually, there are so many stories of real people being cruel, murderous, and doing heinous crimes against others that there have been many of shows dedicated to re-enacting their crimes.

I don’t know how else to explain that there are personality types, like me, that do not enjoy watching pain being inflicted on to others. I don’t even like watching those videos that shows someone doing something stupid and breaking an arm or leg. #EpicFails
I am getting older and don’t need to be reminded of death because the pain of life reminds me every time I wake. I need to be reminded that love is what life is about. What one knows in life, one will also know in death. I want my life to be joy, so in death my joy will multiply with heaven and my passed loved ones…in due time.

Day 8

 

Careers…

Who am I to speak of a career? I am 42 yrs old and I haven’t really had a career that would be very impressive on a resume. I have served in the US Air Force where I worked in a hospital as support to an Air Transport Hospital, aka I was in Medical Logistics. I loved my job in the service! But due to my ever-growing family, I could no longer put service before self. I was pregnant with child #6 and was told that as soon as I came back from maternity leave, I would be sent on a deployment. Push came to shove, I got out of the military with an honorable discharge on my pregnancy. Sadly, I later learned that I made Staff Sergeant on my first test! I could have had a successful career.

I became a stay at home mom for sometime and added child #7 during the career change. I loved being home with my children but I also wanted more than that. I became a Jack of All Trades but a matter at none. I worked as seasonal overnight crew at ToysRUs, an asst manager in food, a store manager for Dollar General, a photographer for school portraits, an auditor for a billing company, a photographer again in a portrait studio and even a sandwich artist. Of course there are more but I don’t want to list every odd job I have had. The point is, I don’t truly have a career. I don’t have something that I can fall back on doing until I reach retirement.

Currently I am working with my 2nd husband in the business he created 10 yrs ago. I have been working along side of him for the past 6 yrs doing lawn maintenance. My husband mows and I do the running around with the trimmer and edger. I do the detail work that others do not really care to do, do not have the time or may lack the ability to do it themselves. So they hire us and I am very proud of the work that I do. It isn’t easy! And the work definitely keeps me in good physical shape! (I love the muscles in my arms:) Here comes the but…. But I am getting older and reminded by my husband and the aches and pains of my body that I can’t do this job until I retire either.

So now what? I have spent most of my life taking care of my children and others leaving me not knowing what I am going to do because I lack the technical skills to acquire a career to carry me the next 25 yrs or so.

What is the lesson learned? I stress to my children to go to college and get a career that will benefit the life style they chose. As for me…I will find something else to do, in due time.

Day 7

Politics…

When I was younger, my parents were not involved in politics. Sure, my grandparents would religiously watch the news every night but they also watched Hee Haw and Wheel of Fortune following the news too. I never saw them get upset over much on the news and I certainly did not hear what they thought about how our government was doing at running our country. My father would normally fall asleep watching the news, so I didn’t have much interest either. We are taught history and the values of “checks and balances” of the government but nobody ever made a lasting impression on me to pay attention or be involved.

It wasn’t until I met my second husband that I starting pay attention, reading more, learning a lot, and becoming angry that I felt betrayed by a government that was supposedly working for The People. Before, politics to me was a bunch of suits being over paid to make laws that we don’t need or don’t understand until it is broken by someone and they served as the example for others not to do such an act. Just Google stupid laws and you will learn some pretty stupid laws some overpaid suits had to write down in the books. But now, I have learned that politics is like religion. Even if you don’t want to admit there is a God and a Devil, doesn’t mean those Powers that Be don’t have an affect or effect you. And to go further, it has been said on many of subjects, if you don’t believe in something, you will fall for anything.

Do you know what it means to be a Conservative? Liberal? Libertarian? Republican? Democrat? Independent? Or how about what a social justice warrior is? Ugh, it is amazing to read and learn about “conspiracies” that actually turned out to be true! Documents that are no longer classified because so much time passed and government turn overs that someone deems it no longer “classified”. You read and discover that there has been a plan to demoralize, legalize, and conform society to a perverted form that our Founding Fathers would be ashamed of.

I am not going to tell you what my political views are at this given time. I am not that bold to share that much about myself yet. My point is this, we all want to have fun and enjoy life but you have to be sure you pay attention to the things that will have an impact on your pursuit to happiness. Pay attention, read the REAL news, don’t be lazy, know what is happening in the world and who is running it because you will be happy you did, in due time.

Day 6